The Real Deal

One thing I can say for sure, when you meet me you meet the real deal. I don't feel entitled to your respect so I will respect you first, in hopes you will respect. If you cannot, then we can do it your way.

I'm not a quitter. I'm not a loser. I am not looking for something for nothing. I am not afraid to stand up for what I know is right. I know I have been bought and paid for, therefore I owe no man.

Like millions before me, and millions to come after, I am not in the most ideal marital relationship. The person I married turned out to be a lot different than me in ways that keep us from communicating on a level I can handle. I was a victim of romance, of wallowing in my own grief brought on by the realization I was not loved by my primary caretakers. I wore the hurt and pain of my childhood like a badge. I chose another wounded soul, but what masked as confidence was pure male ego, and macho bullshit.

Kind, generous at times, good manners, thoughtful and attentive; he fooled me. These were his tools of manipulation to lure his victim into his web of lies, deceit, and out right foolishness. By the time, I figured all this out, we had two kids, etc.

I decided to become a martyr for marriage because I am strong enough to delay my needs, wants and desires for what I know in the long run will be better for my family. I'm the real deal. The ride or die chick. The one that will be there to the end.