I'm So Mean

Not really. Romance has made it impossible for most straightforward, genuine, honest, grounded people to get a far shake. We often have to settle because there are as many closet romance nuts, as there are romance nuts.

Needless to say, I'm married to a romance nut. When we first met, I was more into romance than I knew. I made a lot of romantic gestures, not fully understanding they were romantic gestures. What I knew of love came from songs, TV, movies, books, magazines. I cannot think of one couple throughout my childhood who I recognized loved each other. I saw a lot of lopsided unions, unions of convenience, shotgun unions, etc., but I really cannot think of one couple I looked at and thought, "They are in love."

Some of the reason may be generational, I grew up with parents who were socialized during the 40's and 50's. Neither of them knew what it meant to truly love a mate. I saw the women in my uncles lives act like Bella of the Twilight Series giving up their lives for the men they chose to love.

All of them used romance in some form to cope with the lack of romance and love in their lives. Soup Operas, love songs, girl talk, etc. I remember thinking I would never be like the women who would complain about their lives while my mother coiffured their hair. Many of them agonized over the choices they made and made everyone around the miserable because they no longer felt loved.

I get turned on by thoughtfulness in any form. I am excited when my husband remembers I like lemonade. I love it when he says my name, or when he looks at me as though he's seen me for the first time.

I guess what I am saying is romance cost so much and usually isn't considered romance if you don't pay something. Love? Don't cost a thang!