Right on Time

I have found that school I want to do my graduate work at. The University of Pennsylvania has a Postitive Psychology Center. I had told a friend I had been hesitating going back to school because I was not happy with the traditional psychology model. Too much is focused on limitations, and problems. I wanted to find something that would allow me to use my skills in regards to changing ones perspective.

I really feel like it should be called Perspective Psychology, because changing your perspective on life is the only way to change the things that seem to get to you. they we look at situations, circumstances, and conditions usually keep us from being able to properly deal with them.

I know it was only when I changed they way I looked at life, that my life changed. I have to get things in order. I want to attend next fall.

Lucky

One of the great things about owning my publishing company is every once in a while I actually read a good book. Disciplined Motivation is one of them. Written by Davis Robinson, PHD, Disciplined Motivation is a book that begs you to not only rely on motivation to start projects, but to strenghthen your discipline to complete them.

We all know people who start projects, but cannot seem to finish them. This book addresses the issue in an insightful, easy to read manner. It makes suggestions as to how one can become more disciplined, but does not preach.

Even though I made the announcement last month that I planned to go back to school, this book has solidified my desire and need to do so. I am not completely working within my abilities and only going back and getting my masters in psychology will allow me to do that.

Disciplined Motivation will hit the shelves soon. I will keep you posted.

Losing Hours

When my business picks up, my life shifts greatly because I do it all. I love it though. I love helping people make books.



I am working towards only writing and publishing, with sporadic speaking engagements and a radio show. This is what I see myself doing in the very near future.

The only problem I seem to repeatedly run into is folk looking for a discount before they even sign with me. There is no incentive for me to reduce my prices. I am often insulted by the fact they are so willing to make sure I am making less than I deserve right from the beginning. What a selfish way to begin a relationship.

Yet, i keep doing my best to give the best service I know how to give. What I really like about owning my own business is I do not have to work with anyone I don't want to. I can choose what projects I take on and can leave the others behind.

Gotta stay focused.

Transitioning

A made up mind makes things happen. The plan I made for my life is being played out continuously. What is so amazing is how closely I have stayed on course. I made the decision to make my children the most important aspects of my life. That meant I delayed going to college when I got pregnant with my first daughter.

I could barely stand it, so I went to junior college when she turned one. I could not leave her with anyone until then and then she only stayed with her dad. When I left East St. Louis, it was to go to college, but I had to get a job and I did not attend. It wasn't until I had my second child, 12 years later that I went back to school.

I eventually got my bachelors degree, but decided to wait until my now 14 year old got older before I went back to get my masters and PhD. I have decided now is the time. I made a conscious decision that being home for my children and fully available was most important to me. When I look at my oldest two, I can't help but take a lot of credit for how they have turned out. Even though I know I have had very little to do with the choices they have made as adults, I now I did provide the proper guidance that has given them the ability to make choices.

My youngest is truly getting the best of me because all my little mental defects are well under control. She is subjected less and less to any neurosis I have or may have because I know who I am for sure at this point in my life. With the others, I was still figuring out some major aspects of me.

Now, it is time for me to transition into another career. I want to write full-time on a freelance basis. I will continue to publish books, but I do want to write for others, help others write their works, edit books, articles, etc., and develop new talent. I am transitioning and it feel so right. My kids don't need me anymore. I feel certain they have what they need to make it in the world. Now it is my time.

Timing Is Everything

I made the effort. I told the truth and was unfriended.

I do believe timing is everything and it is still not our time. We can't experience friendship or anything else. It is not that we don't like each other, or that we don't want to spend time with each other. It is simply that time and unforeseen circumstances has hindered us from exploring the relationship that might have been.

I am glad I know that there is a time for everything and some things never get time. This is how it is with us. We had what we had and that wasn't much, but it was ours. Now we understand that where we once thought there was a connection, we now know there is none.

Timing is everything

Can't Help It

With my husband being so sick, I can't help but thinking about the fact I very well may be a young widow. He is only fifty and I will be 49 next month. With this strong possibility looming over my head, I have given thought to whether I could be in another long-term relationship.

I think not. I don't want it. Many men are too needy and everybody is looking for something and dare I say, I have paid my dues. My biggest problem with men is that they are so fragile. Especially when they are in love. I learned a long time ago that a man is hard when he's soft, and soft when he's hard. There are women who spend their lives trying to keep men hard so they can appeal to his soft side. I'm a iron sharpens, iron chick. I cannot submit to ego buffering. This has been a major problem in my present relationship.

At first I didn't know what was going on, I had no idea. Then as I began to study patterns, read more books written by men about men, and generally pay attention; I found that he expected me to let him be wrong, lie, cheat, steal, etc. just because he was the male in the relationship. Or he expected me to let him do something he clearly was not capable of, just because his ego couldn't stand to see me do it. Anyway!

I am a grown ass woman, educated and free. I don't think so. Still, there is a great part of me that likes to have a man around. I know I will miss his presence the most when the time comes. Will I be able to fill that void with something other than another man? I can't help it, I have to wonder. My husband has no idea about how I feel. He is so self-centered and closed off because he really doesn't understand why he is sick. He really has truly connected the dots, so he can't help but feel wronged in some way. He doesn't think about how his feelings about his situation has affected others.

Then there is the whole age range thing. These young guys most definitely aren't ready for me, unless they are in academia, then they probably won't be into the other things I like to do. I can't help it, I wonder about these things. I most definitely will not deal with someone older than 55, even if I am older than 55. He has to be willing to eat healthy and exercise, no exceptions. I am living what can happen when you don't. It doesn't get any worse than to watch someone breath begin snatched away from them. I won't do it again.

I am so glad I live in the present. I don't wonder about these things much. It usually happens when he is really bad like he is now, when I can the life living his eyes. These are the times I can't help it.

Who You Deal With

Before I moved to Louisville, I did research so I could align myself with people who were on the same page as I. I made a conscious decision to only associate with people who were ambitious and wanted to help the community.

By doing that, I was able to realize all of my dreams and goals since I have been here. It has been a fascinating journey. Now I am ready to move on to Atlanta. I have big plans and I know Atlanta is the place to fulfill them.

I do not believe in luck. I truly believe it is all about creating the life you want. But first you must truly know what you want. I am so glad I was blessed at an early age and have know what I want as far as a career since I was 10 years old.

Now, it is just a matter of networking, maintaining viable relationships and continuing to be honest and open to all opportunities.

My Time is Now

Ever since I was 10 years old, I have known I would own my own publishing company and publish my own works. Even then I knew the way I thought was different from others. As I grew and began to understand myself and the world more, it was more than obvious to me that the way I saw the world was not like those around me saw it.

When I went to my 30th High School Reunion in E. St. Louis, Il. Our football coach talked about a young man who was inspired to leave the city after hearing the coach tell his players there was a bigger world than ESL.

I laughed to myself. I didn't need him or anyone else to tell me I could leave. I have planned to move to Evanston, IL in the fourth grade and my classmates still recall the day I told them all. They couldn't believe it then, and can't believe I've been gone for over 25 years. The majority of them still live in the area.

I have always had a sense of wonder and freedom. I still have that and I am now ready to move to Atlanta. I know there is something great waiting there for me to discover. Something only I can bring out of the marvelous city. A vibe, a feeling, an awareness.

It is my turn, and although I don't have all the answers at least I know I'll take my share of chances. This is a line from a Diana Ross song made for the movie "My Turn." I love that movie and the soundtrack even more.

It is my turn and I am ready if I don't get to go.

Don't Get it Twisted

"There ae really only two ways to approach llife, as a victim or gallant fighter--and you must decide if you want to act or react, deal with you own cards or play with a stacked deck. And if you don't decide which way to play with life, it will always play with you." Merle Shain

People often ask, "How's life treating you?" I immediately let them know I don't let life treat me. I am the captain of my destiny.

You have to think like that. You cannot wait on life you have to create, develop, and live the life you desire.

Whose dealing your cards?

No Sale

I was at a book fair this weekend. I didn't sell any of my books. It was sort of disappointing, but for the most part it was a good networking opportunity. I will have pictures on my website shortly.


I know it is just a matter of time that my company receives the recognition it deserves.