Forever is for hope and that is about it. Nothing last forever, especially not people. My relationship with my husband will be forever. His health is not going to let him last much longer, so unless there is a true miracle, he will be married to me forever, but he won't be around to enjoy it.
We need to focus on now and leave forever to itself. I am so glad I participated in my marriage. I am grateful to God that I gave my all and was completely committed. Now that things seem to be coming to an end, I can only be grateful for the time I had with him and know that God has been in control all the time. Things are how they should be.
Forever is the same as never. Neither one of them can ever be true. We don't live to see forever. All we can do is hope for a long time. I got to have the man I wanted for a very long time, a quarter of my life spent on this earth. That means a lot to me. I will always love him and wish him these best whether here are on the other side. Forever is another word for hope.
Showing posts with label keep it real. Show all posts
Showing posts with label keep it real. Show all posts
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Thursday, May 5, 2011
The More I Know
The more I know, the more I know I don't know much. I am a lifelong student and it feels good to be open to new things. So many of us lead with our negative thoughts. This only blocks us from the ability to truly grow as a person. So many people get to a point where they think they know it all.
I am grateful I know there is so much more to learn and that I willing to keep learning until the day I die. To many I come off as a "know-it-all." In reality, I am confident when I am talking about what I do know. My confidence threatens some and baffles many. You see, I am a black woman, with classic features, natural hair and a down-to-earth personality. I really wish I had nickle for every time someone has talked to me with preconceived notions, only to be blown away by finding out they were wrong in all of their assumptions.
Many assume I want to control my surroundings. This is not true. I am just as comfortable being a follower as I am a leader. Many are surprised to find that I am an excellent listener. This really blows folks minds because I like to talk. Many think I'm a cold fish. My husband says I carry myself like a person who is unapproachable. I'm not unapproachable, I just don't want to deal with bullshit, so I wear my bullshit repellent face.
The more I know, the more I believe people are capable of great things. Do something great today. You have it in you.
I am grateful I know there is so much more to learn and that I willing to keep learning until the day I die. To many I come off as a "know-it-all." In reality, I am confident when I am talking about what I do know. My confidence threatens some and baffles many. You see, I am a black woman, with classic features, natural hair and a down-to-earth personality. I really wish I had nickle for every time someone has talked to me with preconceived notions, only to be blown away by finding out they were wrong in all of their assumptions.
Many assume I want to control my surroundings. This is not true. I am just as comfortable being a follower as I am a leader. Many are surprised to find that I am an excellent listener. This really blows folks minds because I like to talk. Many think I'm a cold fish. My husband says I carry myself like a person who is unapproachable. I'm not unapproachable, I just don't want to deal with bullshit, so I wear my bullshit repellent face.
The more I know, the more I believe people are capable of great things. Do something great today. You have it in you.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
BCS-Basic Communication Skills-6
Constructive Use of Feedback
The next important goal for your group is to discover the use of constructive feedback in small group interaction. Feedback is reporting to an individual the kind of impressions he is making on you or reporting your reactions to him. Constructive feedback is rarely effectively used on the value of honesty. Children are taught their homes and schools that it is bad to lie about their behavior. Stealing, lying, cheating, and other dishonest acts are denounced in every aspect of life. Yet, all of us are guilty of a great deal of dishonestly in interpersonal relationships all the time. (Since children are often very aware of this it makes the learning of the value of honesty very complex.) We rarely express our honest feelings toward others in home or in school. Often this involves simply avoiding the expression of reactions which we feel would be detrimental to others or ourselves. Often it involves what we call "little white lies" when we tell people something positive or reassuring rather than be direct, honest, or critical.
People often feel threatened by the introduction of feedback exercises. The notion that people will be hurt by criticism is very prevalent. Yet, think of how many people you know who have goo intention but irritate, embarrass, or behave in ways which diminish their effectiveness. The range of operating efficiently and productively in many areas of life is seriously hampered if we never have a chance to become are of our impact on others. Most of us are quite capable of improving our styles of interpersonal communication and becoming much more effective as people-parents, teachers, students, whatever, when we really become aware of our impact on others.
Before going on to an exercise designed to give and receive feedback to others in the group, it is useful to think about destructive versus constructive feedback. Feedback is destructive when it is given only to hurt or to express hostility without any goal of improving the communication between people. it may be also destructive when only derogatory or extremely critical statements are given without any balance or positive evaluation.
Principles of Constructive Use of Feedback
Feedback is useful to a person when:
The next important goal for your group is to discover the use of constructive feedback in small group interaction. Feedback is reporting to an individual the kind of impressions he is making on you or reporting your reactions to him. Constructive feedback is rarely effectively used on the value of honesty. Children are taught their homes and schools that it is bad to lie about their behavior. Stealing, lying, cheating, and other dishonest acts are denounced in every aspect of life. Yet, all of us are guilty of a great deal of dishonestly in interpersonal relationships all the time. (Since children are often very aware of this it makes the learning of the value of honesty very complex.) We rarely express our honest feelings toward others in home or in school. Often this involves simply avoiding the expression of reactions which we feel would be detrimental to others or ourselves. Often it involves what we call "little white lies" when we tell people something positive or reassuring rather than be direct, honest, or critical.
People often feel threatened by the introduction of feedback exercises. The notion that people will be hurt by criticism is very prevalent. Yet, think of how many people you know who have goo intention but irritate, embarrass, or behave in ways which diminish their effectiveness. The range of operating efficiently and productively in many areas of life is seriously hampered if we never have a chance to become are of our impact on others. Most of us are quite capable of improving our styles of interpersonal communication and becoming much more effective as people-parents, teachers, students, whatever, when we really become aware of our impact on others.
Before going on to an exercise designed to give and receive feedback to others in the group, it is useful to think about destructive versus constructive feedback. Feedback is destructive when it is given only to hurt or to express hostility without any goal of improving the communication between people. it may be also destructive when only derogatory or extremely critical statements are given without any balance or positive evaluation.
Principles of Constructive Use of Feedback
Feedback is useful to a person when:
- It describes what he is doing rather than placing a value on it. Example: "When you yell at me it makes me feel like not talking to you anymore." Rather than: "It's awful of you to yell at me."
- It is specific rather than general.
- It is directed toward behavior which the receiver can do something about.
- It is well-timed.
- it is asked for rather than imposed.
- it is checked to insure clear communication.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
wHOSE RESPONSIBLE?
Responsibility
"Take full responsiblity for your own performance, for every success and every failure. That starts you on the road toward accomplishment. Make yourself responsible to others through honesty, good will, and fair play. That will make your journey truly rewarding."
Be the person you know you can be.
"Take full responsiblity for your own performance, for every success and every failure. That starts you on the road toward accomplishment. Make yourself responsible to others through honesty, good will, and fair play. That will make your journey truly rewarding."
Be the person you know you can be.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Watching for the Signs
My husband's doctor has told him to be watching for the signs of a stroke. He has has four and because the arteries in his brain are hardening, he will possibly have more, or at least one. The signs are there. His eyesight is failing rapidly. I see the terror in his face every time he reads something.
The poor remote, he has dropped it so often I have complete faith in plastic. It still lives. What is the hardest is his memory loss, or inability to retain. I haven't figured out which is the case, but he most definitely doesn't remember much. It was easy for me to play the victim role and say he was not listening to me, that is why he doesn't hear me. I am finding that whether he listening or not, he may not hear, for he is losing his hearing.
Diabetes have ravaged his body. Diabetes is taking the man I married away from me and all I can do is wait and watch for the signs. I can only hope and pray that however it comes he is spared anymore further pain and suffering. The slow, but sure death he is experiencing is painful to watch, but I am there for him as much as I can be.
I do my best to continue to treat him the same, but it is hard because my heart really does recognize he is not the same man. I'm blaming it on bad genes, bad eating habits and habitual denial of reality. He wouldn't do what he was told to do and now it is too late. So we just watch for the signs.
The poor remote, he has dropped it so often I have complete faith in plastic. It still lives. What is the hardest is his memory loss, or inability to retain. I haven't figured out which is the case, but he most definitely doesn't remember much. It was easy for me to play the victim role and say he was not listening to me, that is why he doesn't hear me. I am finding that whether he listening or not, he may not hear, for he is losing his hearing.
Diabetes have ravaged his body. Diabetes is taking the man I married away from me and all I can do is wait and watch for the signs. I can only hope and pray that however it comes he is spared anymore further pain and suffering. The slow, but sure death he is experiencing is painful to watch, but I am there for him as much as I can be.
I do my best to continue to treat him the same, but it is hard because my heart really does recognize he is not the same man. I'm blaming it on bad genes, bad eating habits and habitual denial of reality. He wouldn't do what he was told to do and now it is too late. So we just watch for the signs.
Monday, June 21, 2010
Money Can't Buy Me Love
I have very little disposable cash. Sometimes it bothers me, but for the most part I am grateful for what I do have. I'm not trying to be more, have more, or do more. I'm just trying to learn to continously be grateful for what is.
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