Persistence

"The grandest quality of a true achiever is not natural talent or acquired skil, but persistence--the will to keep going when the way grows hard. The true achiever never give up when difficulty comes. He fights off the discouragement of defeat. Persistence is the most important quality of the consistent winner."

If you want to win at something, do not give up. This is the only reason my husband and I are still married. We want to win at this marriage thing. Neither one of us want divorce as a part of our legacy. We would rather fight than switch and because of that our bond has grown deeper and stronger with every storm that hits us.

The other day my husband laid on top of me and said, "How does it feel to be a failure?" With a puzzled look on my face I asked, "What are you talking about?" "You've been unsuccessful at trying to get rid of me for over 25 years. I'd say you are a big failure." We laughed and gut laugh and enjoyed each others company.

We are winning because we are making the choice. Not because we have some magic going on, or we know some secret method. We are in the trenches, fighting to good fight everyday. That's how you do it. hold on for the good.

Shaved

One of the ways I knew my husband was the man for me is that he had a beard when I met him and it didn't turn me off immediately. I was able to look past it.

The other day he shaved all the hair off his face. He has only done it one of other time in the 25 years I've known him. I love his face that way and when he looked at me I felt a warm throb in my chest area. It was an amazing feeling. I felt like I wanted to be close to him. It turned me on.

Needless to say, the fire has not died for us. We are very lucky considering our past. I know there are people out there somewhere who are sure one of us has killed the other. But that is not the case. We are still giving what we can to each other and making the best out of what we have managed to savage of our relationship throughout our journey together.

I am proud of us. I really am.

Clarification

I feel the need to clarify some of my terms. Below is the definition of marriage and its derivatives. Part of the problem in many cases where an argument ensues, is people are using the same words, but meaning different things.

Look at how simple the definition for marriage is, then think about what you think about when you hear the word. Be honest, it was probably not positive, especially if you are married. We expect everything from marriage, when at the most, all we should expect is to have a close union with our spouse, we should be marriageable, and able to agree on the terms of the marriage which are laid out in the vows.

I used the word God in the title of my series of books, Get Out of the Way! Claim God's Will for Your Marriage, because even in what is termed "legal ceremonies," God is mentioned, especially in America. Throughout the world, most marriage vows include some form of recognition of something greater than the legal aspect of the union through prayer, song, ritual, etc.

Yet, when the marriage seems to be failing, we tend to lean on our own understanding, or that of family and friends, and never quite seek the quiet it takes to get in tune with our Higher Power. Our marriages fail many times because we cannot learn to agree to disagree. We feel because we are married to a person they should be like us, or know what we want, or be everything to us. Read the definition again, and show me where you see any of those things listed.

You can't and you won't. Marriage gives us the opportunity to be better than we could, or would be alone. Marriage offers us the opportunity to learn to communicate, even if it is with only one person. Wouldn't you want that person to be the one you are married to?

Mar*riage - 1a. The legal union of a man and woman as husband and wife. b. Wedlock. 2. A wedding. 3. A close union.

Marriageable - Suitable for marriage, of marrying age. Marriablity, marriageableness.

Marry - 1. To join as spouses by exchanging vows. 2. To combine or blend agreeably.