Back to Lovin'

I can't put my finger on it, but something has changed my husband. It has been almost a month since I returned from my trip to East St. Louis, IL, and he has been a different man in many ways ever since.

He seems to appreciate me more and is less temperamental with me. I mentioned it to him twice and he has confirmed he is making an effort to be a better husband. Better late than never, especially since we are still married.

I know he couldn't do better before now. He has really grown a lot overall as he has approached 50. It is amazing how people have to grow at their own pace. I cried, prayed, yelled and screamed for him to grow up, but he didn't until he was ready and ready for him did not come until this year, a few months before his 50th. He will turn 50 on 11/28/10. He has been hesitant to mention celebrating or even being her on earth because he is so ill. I have tried to be a comfort to him and he allows it now more, than he did just a few months ago. People really can grow.

It is a good thing that with age comes wisdom. Some of us would really be in bad shape if it didn't. I am going to sit back and enjoy what I am experiencing.

Doing Me

I have changed the focus of my business. I was primarily helping others publish their works and promoting them. I have decided to do more traditional publishing and to promote myself more.

I am more of a support person than people are aware of. I love helping others realize their dreams and goals, but I have learned the hard way you cannot motivate people. They have to want it from the jump or it will never happen.

I want it. All that is supposed to be mine. I want it and the only way I will get it is to continue to promote my brand and do the things that get my books noticed.

14 and Counting

My youngest child is 14 today. She is the sweetest devil I know. I am counting down the years to college. I am ready to do me. I am tired of being mommy. I want to be Meme.

She has matured greatly and I appreciate her warm ways and true expressions of love. She is smart and capable. She loves acting and singing and want to be a star. She already is in my eyes.

Happy Birthday dear!

Persistence

"The grandest quality of a true achiever is not natural talent or acquired skil, but persistence--the will to keep going when the way grows hard. The true achiever never give up when difficulty comes. He fights off the discouragement of defeat. Persistence is the most important quality of the consistent winner."

If you want to win at something, do not give up. This is the only reason my husband and I are still married. We want to win at this marriage thing. Neither one of us want divorce as a part of our legacy. We would rather fight than switch and because of that our bond has grown deeper and stronger with every storm that hits us.

The other day my husband laid on top of me and said, "How does it feel to be a failure?" With a puzzled look on my face I asked, "What are you talking about?" "You've been unsuccessful at trying to get rid of me for over 25 years. I'd say you are a big failure." We laughed and gut laugh and enjoyed each others company.

We are winning because we are making the choice. Not because we have some magic going on, or we know some secret method. We are in the trenches, fighting to good fight everyday. That's how you do it. hold on for the good.

Community Minded

I have the Key to the City. I have the Distinguished Citizens Award. I have several other awards that indicate my committment to giving back to whatever community I live in. It is important that we all understand our role in helping the world become a better place.

Get involved in some sort of community activity. Everyone benefits from what one does.

Good Mother

I have been a mother since I was 17 years old. My oldest is 30. Every few months I ask my kids what they think I can do to be a better mother. For years each of them would mention my anger and yelling. I have a list of ten questions and as the years progressed, they only mentioned my level of anger and frustration.

I knew I had an issue with anger and I did my best to deal with the issues that was causing them. Yesterday, my 19 year-old son came told me that I seem a lot happier. He said, "You seem happy. You don't get a near as mad as you used to. I remember how you would always ask what you could change and you actually did it."

I said, "Son, what kids don't realize is most parents still have a lot of growing to do. We grow up with our kids. I'm the type of parent who chose to enlist help from you guys so I could work on what was keeping me from having a closer relationship with each of you. Each time I went down my checklist, all of you focused on the same area, so I did my best to make the necessary changes."

I think my willingness to respect my children makes me a good mother.

New To the World

My view is simple; I believe children should be taken care of by one of their parents for as long as they can before the age of 6. I have made extreme financial sacrifices to have this happen for my children.

I had my first child at 17, a straight A student, my mother and teachers where disappointed because I had gotten pregnant. The fact I decided not to attend college immediately after high school because I wanted to be the one to rear my daughter, really threw them off.

I am the oldest of five children. I recognized very early what I was missing and that was time with my mother. I always felt like I had to fight for her attention. I made a promise to myself if I ever had children, I would put ample space between them, so they had the impression of being the only child, but actually had the support and love of siblings. It worked for me.

My oldest turned 30 last year, my son will be 19 this April, and my youngest will be 14 in August. My relationship with each of them is remarkable. What is even more remarkable to me is that I figured this out at such an early age. I've given my children the essentials. My last two didn't walk until they were over 18 months old because they were always held. My youngest has never been in Toys-R-Us, because we had learned how keep her entertained. They got their time and where genuinely loved for who they are as people.

When we try to do too much, want too much, we tend to leave things behind because there truly is no way to successfully multi-task. So, if you are planning to have to children have a plan. Get your schooling done before you have them, or wait until they are able to express themselves verbally before you become distracted with too many activities. It is great to want to be involved, but we need to really look and make sure we are not using these activities to shun responsibility or to derail accountability.

Knowing who you are really helps, but is often the component lacking in many of us when we start families. We usually want to live the way we were raised whether consciously, or unconsciously. It is all about priorities. Sometimes kids come during times in our lives when we would rather be doing something else. To me, a child is a sign that everything is going to be alright, if we only let go and truly allow the Universe to guide our hearts and steps.