Hindsight truly is 20/20. Being out of my marriage for going on two years has opened my eyes to the reality that we really can lie to ourselves for a long time. I also came to terms with what God was trying to do in my life.
I was in a relationship of my creation. I got out of it what I wanted and a lot of what I didn't want. By the grace of God I survived the whole ordeal, only to have feelings of guilt and despair once it was all over. I didn't want to let go.
I began moving in the right direction once I rid my home of my husband. I had to continue in the direction by removing myself from his life. Due to the fact that we have not family here, and we are still married. When there is an emergency, they call me. I have no problem with this. What I do have a problem with is him calling me whenever he needs me. He only calls me when he wants something from me, but let me need him? Well, need I say more.
Now that I am unemployed, one would think he would offer to help with at least our daughter, but he has not offered any assistance at all. Yet, he continues to call me whenever he wants and whatever time he wants and actually expects me to stop what I am doing to be there for him.
Well, I have stopped doing things for him, period. He hasn't taken the hint as he continues to call me to try to get me involved in his life, but I know I must keep moving in the right direction.
I was relieved of my duties as his wife. They are tasks I should have never taken on. I was given a second chance to find true love and happiness and I will not allow myself to be distracted by anyone.