My oldest came to me and said, "Mom, I want to thank you for being a great example of what it means to let a man be a man.
I was somewhat shocked by her assertion, but definitely pleased because I prided myself on being the type of woman who knew how not to step on a man's toes. I was able to do that because I have always had respect for him as a person and a man. It has never been my desire to rule a man, or to try to change him.
I believe each of us should be allowed to live our lives and be who we are. I held fast to this in my relationship. I did not let who he was keep me from being that kind of wife I wanted to be. My daughter talked of how amazed she was by the fact that I allowed him to do things he had never done before like change diapers, feed the babies, etc. She talked about how many women would have done all they could to take the lead, whereas I literally stepped back and allowed him to make mistakes if that is what was going to happen.
I know I am blessed and it is sort of getting scary because suddenly I am being praised by my children and my ex. My karma feels good and I am thankful for the acknowledgements, but at the end of the day, I am just being me. Who I am just happens to be great!