What I had to learn and many of us do not understand is that marriage does not belong to anyone. If you believe marriage is a covenant, then you know marriage is of God. The very reason so many who enter into the institution fail, is because they try to own it.
Stay with me. Marriage is an agreement two people enter into to share their finances, time, love, caring, devotion, etc; with the understanding that God is the ultimate head of the marriage. This is the part many of us miss and never understand. What I am talking about is what the movie, Not Easily Broken, was about. The movie tried to get the point across that for a marriage to work, each partner has to be willing to defer to the "greater good," which is always God's goal.
Only when we stop self-seeking in our relationships will we be able to see marriage the way God see it. We don't just marry to have the person we think we want for the rest of our lives. Marriage is so much more than that. In marriage, your goal is to promote the happiness and welfare of your mate, not simply expect that they do for you. Oftentimes our expectations are high but our truly willingness to sacrifice is low.
We want to believe our happiness is what matters above all and to a certain degree we are correct. Still that does not mean you get to make a lifelong commitment and just walk away because you are not happy. Truth be told, if you are not happy, it is your own fault because happiness begins within. So if you are not happy now, you probably weren't happy when you made the commitment.
You don't own a marriage. You enter into an agreement to be married to one person and you do this before God. Then you do all you can to destroy the institution based on sharing, with your selfish needs, wants and desires. Marriage gets a bad rap because the folk singing the tune were not good for marriage. Marriage, if operated honestly is one of the most beautiful opportunities for two people to glorify God.