When God Calls You

Seven years ago I got the shock of my life in two ways. I got an investor who gave me money to open my publishing company and my husband began an affair. I was in between being the happiest and the sadest I've ever been. When I confronted my husband about the toher woman, he said, "Well, I guess you want me to move out."

I immediately heard my God voice tell me to say "No." I heard my mouth say no, and immediately went into the bedroom to ask God what was going on.When you are truly called by God, and are open to it and accept it; you are compelled to do whatever He asks without reservation. Whether you understand or not. I wrote about what I felt God wanted me to do. I tell all in the series Get Out of the Way! Claim God's Will for Your Marriage.

I originally thought God was leading me toward being with my husband forever. Then there was some indications otherwise. Finally, in July of this year, God freed me from my marriage. I was to completely get out of the way. I must admit, it is hard to sit on the sidelines, but that's all I am mandated to do. When God calls you, you must obey, no matter what you think should be, He knows best.

My Relationship With God

Back in 2003, God asked me to allow myself to remain in a humiliating marriage. It was right after my husband had done one of the most horrible things that involved my son. I was heartbroken. It wasn't long after that I became aware he was having an affair.

When I discovered the affair, my husband said, "So, I guess you are going to divorce me?" i immediately thought to myself, 'Yes,' but my mouth said no. My God voice told me to say no. God put it on my heart to stay in the marriage and make an effort to reconcile with my husband. I couldn't believe it. I was literally upset, but I could not say no because I believed with all my heart and soul it was God who was guiding my towards rejuvenating my marriage.

I have been blessed to have been aware of God as young as ten years old. I distinctly remember feeling the presence of the Holy Spirit. I recall feeling light in spirit and truly wishing others well. I have always been the "big picture" type person. I have been blessed to know that there is something greater than me.

My relationship with God has been what has kept in line most of my life. I ignored the Holy Spirit when it came to food. Even though I knew better, I'd eat too much. I was steeped in the sin of gluttony.

The significant thing that has most come out of my listening to God that day I wanted to leave my husband was I began to crave food less. More and more as I was obedient, my desire for certain foods went away. I began working with a personal trainer and the weight began to fall off. Seven years later, I have not gained any weight. As a matter of fact, my entire perception of food have changed. My eating habits have changed tremendously and my body is responding greatly.

I know, had not I had the a relationship with God, and was not obedient, I would not have received this great blessing.

Children, Listen to Your Parents

My daughter had an embarrassing experience that will be recorded in her journal as the worst. Because she did not wear the dress I bought her, the dress she wore failed her in the worse way. The audience was gracious. No one laughed out loud; that I could hear.

The wind went out of me. I immediately fell over; in laughter. I didn't laugh out loud. I did a deep chuckle. It was funny; for more than one reason. I warned her of the possibility that what happened would happen. She also had me buy a $90 dress she just "had to have" that would have been perfect and would not have responded to her girth, as the one she chose.

She looked great though. I really liked the outfit. We added some silver butterflies to her boots and they swung back and forth when she walked. I could tell she thought she looked good.

By the end of the day, the regret was obvious. Her dad was loving and kind to her. He had gone and got her from the audience. When she came out of the bathroom, she was in tears. He talked to her sweetly and told her he was sorry that happened to her. In his way, he kept encouraging her to forget about it. Telling her it's over and that she'll never have to see those people again. We all know that was caught on tape. Somebody got of picture of that image.

I have had several of those very embarrassing moments with clothing that didn't fit right for whatever reason. The attention you have to pay to clothing that does not fit well is not worth the time or effort. Just because you can get in something doesn't mean you can wear it. Everything does not look good on everybody. These are simple fashion truths. I know my daughter wishes she had listened to me.

Do Gooder

When people read my book, Get Out of the Way: Claim God's Will for Your Marriage Abigail and Na'bal, they question why I stay in my marriage. After reading the book, The Peacemaker, I have found scripture to help me explain my position:

1 Peter 2:20, 23; 4:19

If you suffer for doing good and you endure it, this is commendable before God. To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps. When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to Him who judges justly. So then, those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good.

When I accepted I had wronged my husband, just as he had wronged me; I decided to forgive him, so that I could be forgiven. At that time, and this, I feel this was God's will. It has been very difficult because my husband has had a hard time turning away from sin. It is in his reflexes to make the wrong choice, wait too long to do the right thing, or to find a way to get over.

I knew God was working through me when I did not feel resentment or hurt when my husband let the enemy guide his choices. At times I knew for sure it was a test of my resolve and I held on. I know God is pleased with me. The signs are clear.

1. I haven't gained weight in seven years. As a matter of fact, I have recently been consistently losing without much effort.
2. My attitude towards life in general has become less stressed filled because I lean on God more than I ever have.
3. I am accountable to God only and it is the most freeing experience. I fear no man.

We must continue to do the right thing whether others/the world feel it is or not. Others judge me by what they would do, I'm leaning towards what Jesus would do.