Turning 51 is a true blessing especially since I am healthy and have my mind in tact. Oh yes, there are times when I have thought I would not only not see 50, let alone 51. It is all good. I am on the right track and that is such a marvelous feeling.
I am doing what I love to do in all areas of my life. I feel no hesitation, no regrets, no limits. For the first time in my life, I have no questions. I feel free and capable.
I just want to live and love and love and live. I cannot find the words to express how clear and clean I feel. How I really believe I can do what I truly focus on and work to achieve. I have proven myself to myself and at age 51 I'm feeling good.
Peace, love and soul!
Showing posts with label self-evaluation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self-evaluation. Show all posts
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Friday, December 28, 2012
What Us Gon Do?
Quote:
"Negroes want change inside but find it difficult to do so unless things outside are changed as well, it is clear that the simplistic solution of "more education" is meaningless when a society is more attuned to race than it is to academic achievement." Dr. Grier and Dr. Cobbs Black Rage
This quote is powerful, still today. Although this book was written in 1968, it is very relevant today. We as black people have been told that all we have to do is get an education and the doors to success will open up for us. This is not true and never has been. We must change inside to make the world different on the outside. Even white folk have to do that.
It is who we are that keeps us where we're at. Yes, the color of our skin does play a huge roll in our daily lives, whether we recognize or not. Still, we are human and have unlimited potential, especially as black people. Our people survived some of the worse conditions imaginable. We are all miracles times two.
Yet, we have bought into the belief we are subhuman and many of us act this belief out everyday. We are afraid to be who we are, feel our feelings and let it be known that we matter. What us gon do? When will we stop perpetuating the plantation mentality that kept our American African ancestors bound? When will accept that we are a grand people, full of wonder, love and passion? When will we stop the ramped collective self-hate that keeps brother against brother, sister against sister and ourselves in deep spiritual warfare?
We have the knowledge, but we have yet to apply it waiting on the white man to again set us free. Waiting on the white man to love us so we can love ourselves. We are so blind to our brilliance that we don't understand that they already love us. So much so, that they can't sell a car, a burger, a bag of chips, without using our music, our phrases, our style. Why can't we see through their lies? What us gon do?
"Negroes want change inside but find it difficult to do so unless things outside are changed as well, it is clear that the simplistic solution of "more education" is meaningless when a society is more attuned to race than it is to academic achievement." Dr. Grier and Dr. Cobbs Black Rage
This quote is powerful, still today. Although this book was written in 1968, it is very relevant today. We as black people have been told that all we have to do is get an education and the doors to success will open up for us. This is not true and never has been. We must change inside to make the world different on the outside. Even white folk have to do that.
It is who we are that keeps us where we're at. Yes, the color of our skin does play a huge roll in our daily lives, whether we recognize or not. Still, we are human and have unlimited potential, especially as black people. Our people survived some of the worse conditions imaginable. We are all miracles times two.
Yet, we have bought into the belief we are subhuman and many of us act this belief out everyday. We are afraid to be who we are, feel our feelings and let it be known that we matter. What us gon do? When will we stop perpetuating the plantation mentality that kept our American African ancestors bound? When will accept that we are a grand people, full of wonder, love and passion? When will we stop the ramped collective self-hate that keeps brother against brother, sister against sister and ourselves in deep spiritual warfare?
We have the knowledge, but we have yet to apply it waiting on the white man to again set us free. Waiting on the white man to love us so we can love ourselves. We are so blind to our brilliance that we don't understand that they already love us. So much so, that they can't sell a car, a burger, a bag of chips, without using our music, our phrases, our style. Why can't we see through their lies? What us gon do?
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Are You a Winner or a Loser?
The winner is always a part of the answer.
The loser is always a part of the problem.
The winner always has a program.
The loser always has an excuse.
The winner says, "Let me do it for you."
The loser says, "That's not my job."
The winner sees an answer for every problem.
The loser sees a problem in every answer.
The winner sees a green near every sand trap.
The loser sees two or three sand traps near every green.
The winner says, "It may be difficult but it's possible."
The loser says, "It may be possible, but it's too difficult."
The choice is yours at any given minute. We were all born to win!
The loser is always a part of the problem.
The winner always has a program.
The loser always has an excuse.
The winner says, "Let me do it for you."
The loser says, "That's not my job."
The winner sees an answer for every problem.
The loser sees a problem in every answer.
The winner sees a green near every sand trap.
The loser sees two or three sand traps near every green.
The winner says, "It may be difficult but it's possible."
The loser says, "It may be possible, but it's too difficult."
The choice is yours at any given minute. We were all born to win!
Saturday, December 3, 2011
The Closer I Get to Me
These past few months have been life changing. Being in human being mode has been exactly what I have needed. I have been doing for others so long that I could feel my human being screaming out to be loved. I needed to love myself. I needed to be there for myself. I need to stand up for my inner child, love her and shut her up. For years she ruined my life with her impulsive behaviors with food.
Now that I have gotten closer to me, I do not have to use food as a buffer between me and the world. I am completely unafraid to stand up for myself and the woman I want to be. For so long, I ran from my personal power. Like so many victims, I kept wanting to blame someone else, so someone else could fix me.
Oh what a blessing the day I accepted that I was perfect the way I am and that only through self-acceptance would I ever be able to live the full life God has intended. Part of me wants to rush out into the world like a bright-eyed teenager. I really feel like there is nothing I can't do if I put my mind to it. I feel like life is beckoning for me to search out the love I feel I need so that I can give the love I desire to share.
The closer I get to me, the more I see how wonderful of a human being I can be.
Now that I have gotten closer to me, I do not have to use food as a buffer between me and the world. I am completely unafraid to stand up for myself and the woman I want to be. For so long, I ran from my personal power. Like so many victims, I kept wanting to blame someone else, so someone else could fix me.
Oh what a blessing the day I accepted that I was perfect the way I am and that only through self-acceptance would I ever be able to live the full life God has intended. Part of me wants to rush out into the world like a bright-eyed teenager. I really feel like there is nothing I can't do if I put my mind to it. I feel like life is beckoning for me to search out the love I feel I need so that I can give the love I desire to share.
The closer I get to me, the more I see how wonderful of a human being I can be.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
How To Take Control of Your Life
"We are not able to use our emotions to guide us in making the necessary and important choices in our life." Robin Norwood Women Who Love Too Much.
Recognizing that most of my problems stemmed from my inability to regulate and control my emotions has been the best thing I've done for myself as a wife, mother, friend, employee, but most of all a woman.
Most women are not in tune with what they are really in tune with. This is why so many of us seem hysterical and out of control. We go with feelings, that had we took a second to filter, we would not go there. Yet, time and time again we fail to recognize the power our feelings and emotions have over our ability to make proper choices.
One of the biggest problems is people tend to believe that what they feel and believe is real. They don't pay attention to how often they change their minds, or how their feelings change rapidly. So many folk believe it is okay to live the disjointed lives that develop from a lack of self-control.
To take control of you life, you must monitor your feelings and emotions, learn to pick your battles, and provide yourself with the proper self-care when needed. Our lives are out of control because we are out of control. Not because someone else is doing or not doing something. It is your life, therefore, your responsibility to monitor and maintain it.
You become in control when you accept full responsibility for how you feel at any given moment. You are in control when you stop blaming others for your shortcomings and disappointments. Take control of your life, by taking control of you.
Recognizing that most of my problems stemmed from my inability to regulate and control my emotions has been the best thing I've done for myself as a wife, mother, friend, employee, but most of all a woman.
Most women are not in tune with what they are really in tune with. This is why so many of us seem hysterical and out of control. We go with feelings, that had we took a second to filter, we would not go there. Yet, time and time again we fail to recognize the power our feelings and emotions have over our ability to make proper choices.
One of the biggest problems is people tend to believe that what they feel and believe is real. They don't pay attention to how often they change their minds, or how their feelings change rapidly. So many folk believe it is okay to live the disjointed lives that develop from a lack of self-control.
To take control of you life, you must monitor your feelings and emotions, learn to pick your battles, and provide yourself with the proper self-care when needed. Our lives are out of control because we are out of control. Not because someone else is doing or not doing something. It is your life, therefore, your responsibility to monitor and maintain it.
You become in control when you accept full responsibility for how you feel at any given moment. You are in control when you stop blaming others for your shortcomings and disappointments. Take control of your life, by taking control of you.
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Why I Survived Hell
In many ways, my marriage was hell. I did what so many women do and married my mother, father and child molester. My husband was a great candidate to continue to not give me what I needed most, to be loved.
My parents had some serious issues. They both were keeper's of secrets and deniers of their reality. Even though their intent was to create a home life. They created hell instead. Because they married due to my mother being pregnant with me, I was born into a situation that called for me to be treated badly because I reminded them both of the bad decision they made to have unprotected sex.
I survived the hell of my childhood upbringing, and later a 26 year crazy marriage because I never lost my personal integrity. "Women who love too much have little regard for their personal integrity in a love relationship," according to Robin Norwood, author of the 1986 groundbreaking book, "Women Who Love Too Much."
This book deals with the very true reality that many women who come from dysfunctional homes tend to seek out the same abuse within their love relationships. Even though I entered into my marital relationship seeking the love I did not receive as a child, as I matured, I was able to heal myself because unlike many other women, I held tight to my personal integrity.
My husband would tell me often he was proud of how I never give up on my convictions, beliefs, morals and values. After being together for 20 years, he congratulated me for the fact that I never backed down. I did not (not even under the tremendous pressure he put me under), change or alter what I believed in to try to keep or please him. As a matter of fact, if he got too out of hand, I'd put him out, rather than give an inch when it came to my person integrity.
I survived hell because I stood up to the devil, instead of giving in to the many ways he tried to lure me. My marriage taught me I am strong and capable of great love, especially self-love. I survived hell, because I kept Heaven on my mind.
My parents had some serious issues. They both were keeper's of secrets and deniers of their reality. Even though their intent was to create a home life. They created hell instead. Because they married due to my mother being pregnant with me, I was born into a situation that called for me to be treated badly because I reminded them both of the bad decision they made to have unprotected sex.
I survived the hell of my childhood upbringing, and later a 26 year crazy marriage because I never lost my personal integrity. "Women who love too much have little regard for their personal integrity in a love relationship," according to Robin Norwood, author of the 1986 groundbreaking book, "Women Who Love Too Much."
This book deals with the very true reality that many women who come from dysfunctional homes tend to seek out the same abuse within their love relationships. Even though I entered into my marital relationship seeking the love I did not receive as a child, as I matured, I was able to heal myself because unlike many other women, I held tight to my personal integrity.
My husband would tell me often he was proud of how I never give up on my convictions, beliefs, morals and values. After being together for 20 years, he congratulated me for the fact that I never backed down. I did not (not even under the tremendous pressure he put me under), change or alter what I believed in to try to keep or please him. As a matter of fact, if he got too out of hand, I'd put him out, rather than give an inch when it came to my person integrity.
I survived hell because I stood up to the devil, instead of giving in to the many ways he tried to lure me. My marriage taught me I am strong and capable of great love, especially self-love. I survived hell, because I kept Heaven on my mind.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Why Failure Is Not An Option
I have spent the majority of my life trying to be the best I can be. Failure, is not an option for me. I only have this one life and I am going to give it all I have. Failure is the lazy man's way to get sympathy. He refuses to do what he can and falls short because of it.
I know I am capable and willing. All I have to do is do it. It is my time to shine and I will with great appreciation for every opportunity I get.
Failure is not an option!
I know I am capable and willing. All I have to do is do it. It is my time to shine and I will with great appreciation for every opportunity I get.
Failure is not an option!
Friday, September 30, 2011
As Plain As The Nose On My Face
God called me to be a psychologist the day I opened my eyes on this earth. I have been a humanist all my life. A psychologist is a humanist that gets paid for their insight into human nature and their ability to help others recognize their intrinsic worthiness as human beings, thus allowing them to alter their perspective so that they may enjoy the richness and wholeness living life can bring.
This is what I have always known God wants me to do. I do it all the time, but things are taking a different form. Because of our litigious society, I think it is wise for me to get my doctorate. Since I have been posting on Facebook, I have had several people seek me out for comfort, solace, direction, etc.
I do believe it is God's continuous effort to have me live my best life. I has become as plain as the nose on my face. I applied to college Thursday morning. It is time I do what I was born to do.
This is what I have always known God wants me to do. I do it all the time, but things are taking a different form. Because of our litigious society, I think it is wise for me to get my doctorate. Since I have been posting on Facebook, I have had several people seek me out for comfort, solace, direction, etc.
I do believe it is God's continuous effort to have me live my best life. I has become as plain as the nose on my face. I applied to college Thursday morning. It is time I do what I was born to do.
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