I have began reading a book titled, Forgotten God. This deals with the very real reality that the Spirit of God has all but left the church as it is today.
Reading this book has clarified so very powerful experiences in my life. I understand better why I was able to follow God's will so easily. It is because I have read the scripture for myself. I understand and believe the promises made by God and I want to receive them, so I chose to develop a deep, loving relationship with Him.
Even though I have had a relationship with God for a long time, being human I was not exempt of falling pray to the world during my twenties. I lacked the confidence and self-awareness needed to stand firm in my beliefs and convictions. Now, knowing me and understanding that all I have is by the grace of God, I seek His guidance consistently, and I believe my life is a true testament to the fact.
I have walked in faith all my life. When I was a kid, there was a girl who picked on my everyday. She would walk behind me and push me in my back all the way home. I never turned around and looked at the crowd that would develop. I folded my arms and endured whatever licks she threw. I now know that I understood even then that God was going to take care of me and that I would be the better person in the end for having the resolve to maintain my cool and walk away.
Now, even more than ever I feel the presence of God in my life. I feel as though there is nothing I cannot do, because I know God has my back and only wants the best for and from me. When God showed me he intended for me to endure my marriage, instead of leave it when I found out my husband had a mistress, at first I couldn't believe it. I even filed for divorce, but I could never go through with it. I felt convicted everytime I even thought about proceeding. I have since come to realize it was because God has so much more for me to do.
I have willing given myself to what I believe is God's purpose for my life. I am open to change, willing to grow and eager to serve. Living God's will really is the only way to truly live.