Monday, October 3, 2011

Why The Man Brain Has Gotten On My Nerves

Yes, I have written many pieces empathizing with men, but this one does not. Men think differently than we do and that is okay. Unfortunately, they are just as confused by the way they think as women are.

I began reading books written by men about men because I recognized I did not understand the "Man brain." During my studies, I became more and more compassionate as I learned many of the things I hated about men the most, were just a part of their natures. Just how they are wired.

This is when I accepted that we are to discover what the other sex is about and not try to assume we know them based on our limited experiences with them, still the man brain gets on my nerves. There ability to compartmentalized their actions gets me the most. This ability is what will allow a man who is "happy," at home, to stray. He can actually rationalize his actions by saying he keeps what he does away from home separate, and that because he does not love the woman, it does not matter. He has the love for his wife in a safe compartment in his mind.

We all know this is unacceptable, but it is true that because they think this way it is okay to act on their thoughts. Compartmentalization can be helpful if used correctly, but all the men I know have used it to be selfish, then justify the selfishness by stating, one act has nothing to do with the other.

Men also seem to experience only two emotions anger and sexual desire. Either they are mad or horny. The in between is rarely visited. For most of them, they don't even out until it is almost too late. By that time, everyone is so used to them not meeting their needs, they are either bitter, or just don't give a damn. What lonely way to live.

The other thing that bothers me is their ability to play stupid. Before they were married, or living with a woman, they didn't have any problem finding their socks, ironing and washing their clothes, feeding themselves, but even the most enlightened brother will take advantage of a woman if she lets them. They'll run her ragged getting beers, looking for lost items, and running errands.

Then, there is the constant ego stroking many of them require. This turned out to be my biggest resentment in my marriage. My husband required way too much ego stroking. I am not the nurturing type, so it has been a huge problem for me for years, even before I fully understood what the problem was. If you have such a massive ego, you need to tend to its maintenance yourself, because usually folk with ego issues have few people who want to be around them.

The man brain is useful, but right now I can do without it.

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