A made up mind makes things happen. The plan I made for my life is being played out continuously. What is so amazing is how closely I have stayed on course. I made the decision to make my children the most important aspects of my life. That meant I delayed going to college when I got pregnant with my first daughter.
I could barely stand it, so I went to junior college when she turned one. I could not leave her with anyone until then and then she only stayed with her dad. When I left East St. Louis, it was to go to college, but I had to get a job and I did not attend. It wasn't until I had my second child, 12 years later that I went back to school.
I eventually got my bachelors degree, but decided to wait until my now 14 year old got older before I went back to get my masters and PhD. I have decided now is the time. I made a conscious decision that being home for my children and fully available was most important to me. When I look at my oldest two, I can't help but take a lot of credit for how they have turned out. Even though I know I have had very little to do with the choices they have made as adults, I now I did provide the proper guidance that has given them the ability to make choices.
My youngest is truly getting the best of me because all my little mental defects are well under control. She is subjected less and less to any neurosis I have or may have because I know who I am for sure at this point in my life. With the others, I was still figuring out some major aspects of me.
Now, it is time for me to transition into another career. I want to write full-time on a freelance basis. I will continue to publish books, but I do want to write for others, help others write their works, edit books, articles, etc., and develop new talent. I am transitioning and it feel so right. My kids don't need me anymore. I feel certain they have what they need to make it in the world. Now it is my time.