My son is going through his "breaking away" period. He is finally looking at my husband and myself without his rose colored glasses and he does not like what he sees. We should be better, do better, give more.
He and his father have mended a riff that I thought for sure would keep them apart forever. Somehow my son was able to accept he was wrong and he apologized to my husband, who accepted with grace.
When we talked, my husband told me he was very angry over the initial falling out and wanted to physically retaliate. He said he thought about how to deal with the situation for weeks and he eventually prayed for guidance and felt God wanted him to do nothing, which he did. I told him I was just trying to keep my family together and he agreed he had the same purpose.
I was very proud of my husband as I too thought he would do something impulsive, but was so glad that as everyday passed, so did his anger. My husband has done a lot to hurt my son. My son has struggled with how to feel about who he thinks his father should be and who he is. I tell him all the time, "it doesn't matter in the end, he is still your father and to live a good life, you must honor that."
I am a happy woman. My dysfunctional family is functioning on a higher level as each day goes by. With the tension gone we can all get about our business of loving and taking care of each other as families ought to do. We will never be perfect, but were perfectly fine with our imperfections.
My son and husband have a lot to work out and I'm just grateful to God that my husband is finally growing up enough to be able to handle his role as father. It is such a beautiful thang.